Oh My Love, My Darling


ScarredJoy is all about taking a realistic view of life including the experiences that turn our world upside down. Admittedly and without apology, ScarredJoy at times enters into the raw and hellish pain some people encounter in life. Some things are beyond comprehension to us. I question, therefore, the validity of such cliches that may be blindly accept, such as, there is a reason for everything that happens to us. There is?

ScarredJoy does not shy away from being controversial at times. This post is not meant to be controversial.

With this post I would like to highlight more of the “joy” than the “scarred” part of life. A few years ago a song hit the charts on radio that people still sing today. The song is, Unchained Melody and became a hit due to the singing duo The Righteous Brothers. The song begins, “Oh my love, my darling. I’ve hungered for your love, a long lonely time.”

Who is your love? Is there someone your heart longs for? Is this an easy question for you to answer? I’m sure some people will immediately want to answer with replies like, “I love God and my heart longs for Him!” Okay, I get it and that’s valid. I’ll ask the question again this way. Of all the people you know in your life, who does your heart hunger for more than anyone else? Unchained Melody is a love song. In the context of my question who is your “darling”?

This morning I got up early to do some writing and work on my soon coming website. My “darling,” my wife, surprised me and arose early also. I thought with it being Saturday she would like to sleep in a bit. I often get up early on a Fri. or Sat. morning and head to a local coffee shop to do some writing. Often at 6:00am or so there aren’t too many people in the coffee shop and it is nice and quiet. As I was getting ready to go out and my darling was relaxing on the couch I sang Unchained Melody for her listening pleasure. Well, at least I think she was listening! Maybe she wasn’t even listening too intently. Oh boy, now I’m rethinking whether my darling takes pleasure in my singing. The romantic in me is confident she did.

Now before I go any farther, I have to clarify something. As a more introverted person, I don’t sing to just anyone. My darling and I have been together for years. I feel safe with her and trust her to know more about me than anyone else.  If you, dear reader, ask me to sing for you the answer is, no!

Do you sing to or for your darling? Do you long for your darling? Do you hunger for your darling’s touch?

From the perspective of ScarredJoy my darling is not to be taken for granted. As a selfish creature I may slip from this priority from time to time. I know others have as well. This happens in life. I guess it is human to default toward our selfish nature. If you have a darling he or she becomes your heart’s love.

Many people are amazed when they hear my darling and I have been married to each other for almost forty years. There are more of us in married love for that many years than one may believe. Marriage, the union of a man and woman, is alive and well, in spite of the political correct awkwardness of our day.

Even after almost forty years of marriage to the same woman I still have a long way to go. I still make mistakes. I still have selfish moments. I have insecurities. I beat myself up as a failure. I have times where I think I didn’t provide for my wife and family as best I could. I see in such misgivings my own room for growth. As a Christian, I even wonder if I indeed love my wife as Christ loves His people. It is in light of this standard I pray, Lord have mercy, Christ have mercy.

The melody of my love for my darling goes on. Sometimes I get out of tune. Sometimes I forget all the lines. Sometimes I feel unworthy of her love. Our melody, however, while perhaps still under construction, is sweet! It is music to my ears!

Oh my love, my darling, I hunger for your love!

6 thoughts on “Oh My Love, My Darling

  1. Such a romantic and seriously loving soul, thou art, Alan! It shines in your every word and your interactions. Terry is blessed to be your wife. I am blessed to be your friend! Nicely written. And a great example in this crumbling world!


    1. Hi Glynis! I think I’m the blessed one! 🙂 It doesn’t seem like almost forty years. When I see our kids and grandkids, I see our blessings over the years for sure. Thank you so much for being my friend! We will grow old together in great company!


  2. What a blessing you are to those of us who have only known you a short time from Facebook…your wife is a very blessed woman…as I am sure you are a very blessed man…Love your stories…Keep sharing..


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